{Tested Again [continued]}[28th March 1990]

[Redbook7:106-107][19900328:1738b]{Tested Again [continued]}[28th March 1990]

19900328.1738

[continued]

It was entirely from these types* that the hostile questioning came, and it struck me (later) as being mostly of an evangelical bent:** eg ‘Do you believe that it is essential to be a Christian?’ – not only in its wording but in its tone and in the follow-up. And: ‘If we [reject this application], will you move Heaven and Earth to be ordained?’*** I did not prevaricate, but I did – as [one of my referees] had rightly suggested I would, in his reference – refuse to give any absolute answers because, as I said more than once, absolute truth is only with God and therefore I had to accept the possibility of myself (or themselves) being mistaken.****

I suspect that this, and my written answer in Box 28 of the form, may have given them the idea that I was uncertain. If so, they obviously haven’t understood the implications of box 27,#* and I can’t help feeling that is a little bit dumb (if not deliberate).

*[See last previous entry]

**Probably wrongly (see last previous entry, [[Redbook7:104-114][19900328:1738]{Tested Again}[25th March 1990],] 105, note = ****

***{See [[Redbook7:115-121][19900404:2346]{The Church and I}[4th April 1990],] 120}

****I then gave my answers subject to that.

#ref [[Redbook7:44-53][19900214:1100d]{Form MC/PS/90/1: Be My Valentine}[14th February 1990]] 51

[The Registration Form for the Provincial Selection Panel and the Provincial Selection Board for Ordination Candidates, which is photocopied at pp 45-53 of the ms but is not reproduced in the ts]

[‘28. What aspects of the ordained ministry attract you most?’ ‘Doing what the Holy Spirit of God wants me to do. If, as appears to be the case, it wants me to become a Priest (It knows why), then a Priest is what I hope to become in due course. After that I hope to so whatever it wants me to do at any time.’]

#*[‘27. What do you perceive yourself doing as an ordained minister?’ ‘My most frequent prayer is: “Tell me what to do/what to say/where to go and I’ll do it/say it/go there.” (My other frequent prayer is: ‘Oh God, I’m sorry I’m such a fool.’ – generally when I’ve failed to ask, or to listen, or to understand, or to do what I’m told in response.’)]

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