{Dream: The Speeding Coach [continued]}[4th April 1987]

[Redbook3:95-96][19870404:1005c]{Dream: The Speeding Coach [continued]}[4th April 1987]

19870404.1005

[continued]

Aspects of yesterday and today which may be linked* to this relapse** include the following:

• Yesterday morning we agreed with the vendors of [CH] that nothing now stood in the way of exchange of contracts. On approaching former prospective purchases I have become depressed and uneasy about them; but this has not so far happened with [CH]. All the same, it is a large commitment.
• Our immediate reaction was high-spirited. Anti-climax may have been a consequence.
• When we go to [CH] we shall come into contact with relatives again. This thought made [W] as well depressed about [the] flat, etc..
• Yesterday was (and today is) a grey, enclosed day with no visible sky features, no distinct horizon, and greyness affecting all natural colours. It was also wet.
• I have not had dyspepsia worth mentioning for about two weeks; but for two or three days (but not today) I have had acidity*** at the rear end. I mention this rather private fact because in the past I have noticed that this acidity in the bottom seems often to accompany a tendency towards 'negative' or dark feelings, e.g. resentment of those around me, etc.; which I tend to associate with the Outer Circle aspect of the archetype +Mk. (It**** happened at both +Mk points in [2], when I was writing: greatest at the first, i.e. around the Distraction of the Diversity Club, when I made [W]'s life miserable before I thought about why it was happening then; much less**** * during +Mk's brief appearance in May Week, when I was expecting it; and not at all during the final party, when I should imagine he was 'balanced out' by the Company present.)
• [See next entry]

*(i.e. one may cause the other or both be caused by another.)

**[See last two previous entries]

***(I understand that acidity was a problem of my Mother's family – my Father told me years ago....)

****(i.e. mental and physical.)

**** *(mental only???)

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