{A Dream of Leaving, and the Dark Horseman}[14th September 1981]

[Redbook2:200-201][19810914:0810]{A Dream of Leaving, and the Dark Horseman}[14^th September 1981]

19810914.0810

In my dream I sat in a classroom trying to understand a boring video quiz game. Everyone else played; I could not. The teacher stood by the door. I stood and asked to leave; he refused permission. I went back to my desk but when he was at the front of the class I went anyway, saying that I would fill myself a bad report form; there was nothing for me there.

I ran innocent through the evening of the town on the hill – perhaps naked, I am not sure. Lights were coming on. I took a slightly different route from the one I recognised, and found myself at an edge over which I had to drop without being able to see the bottom in darkness. But the drop turned out to be not heavy.

At some stage, I came to another edge and saw, moving slowly across the evening horizon, the dark cloud shape of a vast horseman*. No one else was around to see it.

It was dark outside. At some stage I saw bright children in a supermarket, and the old argument was rehearsed, this time correctly: These children are qualifying for the good jobs. My answer was not: but I wish for a lesser qualification and a lesser job (as it was last time, waking) but: I wish for no job.

I know that I did reach some sort of destination, but not what was there.

I awoke with, and have (fading) still, that same innocence of mind and body.

*moving Northwards I think – in the same direction as me, anyway.

The image of the dark horseman, in the evening sky beyond the edge, often returns to me. <930116>

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