{Involuntary Creativity}[14th March 1989]

[Redbook6:111)][19890314:1445c]{Involuntary Creativity}[14th March 1989]

19890314.1445

[continued]

About to hose my gumboots in the Byre,* I decided to reverse the usual procedure and turn on the tap before picking up the hose. There was no good reason to do this – I knew what would be the likely result – yet I did it, and naturally soaked myself.

Why did I do it?

I am** the kind of soldier who gives Sergeants apoplexy, because when every highly trained soldier turns to the right, I turn to the left – just occasionally. This*** (I have never actually done this so far) is neither accidental nor deliberate: it just happens. I suspect that it is part of the ‘evolutionary’ mechanism by which new techniques develop: it is an unconscious manifestation of creativity, and allows new ways of doing things to emerge in primitive societies and other instinctive organic structures. Individuals who behave like this are both dangerous and potentially rewarding to be with.

.2010

They belong, I guess, to the J~-G~-R~ arc of Fragmentation-Revolution-Simplification (or Love-Revelation-Creation), where I have tended to feel at home in many respects.

*[at CH]

**[was; or: am the kind of person who as a soldier….]

***[sort of thing]

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{Schizophrenia and Race (1) [continued]}[14th March 1989]

[Redbook6:110)][19890314:1445b]{Schizophrenia and Race (1) [continued]}[14th March 1989]

19890314.1445

[continued]

I was struck by the description* by a schizophrenic of how he heard voices singing above him, ** and saw a spaceship with a red light high in the sky… suggesting that schizophrenics perceive as actual (ie external) manifestations which I perceive as not actual but real (ie inner) in my writing.* As I am not schizophrenic,*** but write about disintegration and integration of the personality (etc) in archetypically symbolic form, this suggests strongly that Jung was on to something. <.2335>****

*[In the TV programme referred to in the last previous entry]

**[eg [0]]

***[cf eg [Redbook3:15-16][19860907:0612j]{A Dream: [(6)] of Madness}[7^th September 1986];

& a letter written by the writer’s university college authorities to his parents during his first year (discovered by the writer very much later) enquiring whether there was any history of mental illness in the family.]

****[This paragraph is in the ms form of a long marginal note, evidently added to the last previous entry later the same day]

[→ [Redbook6:114)][19890314:2305b]{Schizophrenia and Race (2)}[14th March 1989]]

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{Schizophrenia and Race (1)}[14th March 1989]

[Redbook6:110)][19890314:1445]{Schizophrenia and Race (1)}[14th March 1989]

19890314.1445

On a TV programme last night,* studies were said to show that Afro-Caribbean immigrants and/or their descendants were ten times more likely to develop schizophrenia than the World’s population in general (20 in 10,000, against 2 in 10,000). Critics attacked the basis of these studies.

Very broadly, and without committing myself to a cultural or racial basis for this, and bearing in mind the potential independence and actual uniqueness of every Individual, I might speculate as follows:

[Text extracted from ms diagram reproduced above:]

			C
	R		|		S
		Negro?**		Chinese?
G~		–	+	–		M~
		Indian?		European?
	J		|		U
			A~

But such an analysis is of limited value, as any attempt to apply it runs up against numerous exceptions.

*19890313.2010ff BBC1, Horizon

**[See [Redbook4:232][19871215:2232d]{Schizophrenia (2) [continued (4)]}[15th December 1987]]

[& with sincere apologies to anyone offended by the term, which may have been thought to have a wider meaning than Afro-Caribbean]

[continues]

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{A Dream: All Wrong in the Church}[9th March 1989]

[Redbook6:109)][19890309:2040]{A Dream: All Wrong in the Church}[9th March 1989]

19890309.2040

Thinking about dreams – and dreams about the Church and churches,* in particular – must have been the trigger for a dream this morning involving:**

{(1)} being in the wrong clothes*** for our church – everyday working (and dirty) clothes;

{(2)} sitting in the back at the side of our church, in a position, behind some structure, from which I could not see the Altar – but with the Canon**** of our church further back still, behind me;

{(3)} wandering in the ruins of the back of the church, under the sky, but possibly within some kind of perimeter enclosure, and hearing a voice ask whether this was the kind of Church which the mother # of two particular women in the congregation (?) would have been happy with; and

(4) not going to church at all, and seeing everyone coming back from the service.

*{cf II. [[Redbook2:237-238][19820809:0845b]{A Dream: The Unfinished Cathedral/Church}[9^th August 1982]ff,] 237,

[[Redbook2:283-284][19830526:1200b]{Two Dream fragments: [continued] … and a Collapsing Church}[26th May 1983],] 283}

[ cf eg [Redbook2:195][19810811:2320]{A Dream of the Devil; A Dream of the Soul*; A Dream of the Church}[11^th August 1981];

[Redbook2:215-216][19811221:1815]{A Dream of Three Chapels}[21st December 1981];

[Redbook2:280][19830518:1300]{A Dream of Christchurch}[18^th May 1983];

[Redbook2:300-301][19830826:0045]{A Dream of Missed Directions: Three Chapels and the White Hotel}[26th August 1983];

[Redbook2:304-305][19831007:1430b]{Dream: Idle in Church}[7^th October 1983];

[Redbook2:325][19840116:2400b]{A Dream of Three Churches}[16^th January 1984];

[Redbook2:350][19841118:1935]{A Dream: Of Destinations}[18^th November 1984];

[Redbook3:10-11][19860907:0612c]{A Dream: [(2)] The Black-faced Rector}[7^th September 1986];

[Redbook3:11][19860907:0612d]{A Dream: [(3)] Church Accounts}[7^th September 1986];[Redbook3:14][19860907:0612h]{A Dream: [(4)] Profaning the Church}[7^th September 1986];

&c?

]

**not necessarily in this order

***{V. [[Redbook5:123][19880527:2240]{A Dream of the Church: The Incomplete Staircase}[27th May 1988],] 123}

****[XQ – see eg [Redbook5:121-122][19880523:1212b]{Church (2)}[23rd May 1988]; & fn refs]

#{g~? [of] r~ [&] j~} [See [Redbook6:38-39)][19881126:1330]{Right Homosexuality}[26th November 1988]]

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{Ghosts [continued]}[2nd March 1989]

[Redbook6:107-109)][19890302:2317b]{Ghosts [continued]}[2nd March 1989]

19890302.2317

[continued]

After all, on the Circle pattern of inner-circle fusing, a passage through Diversity is inevitable: this may be why the spirits of the recently deceased are often felt to remain around their homes and kin for a short while* after Death – after the First Death,** and after or perhaps during the Second Death** – until their presence fades into memory. There are, of course, perfectly adequate psychological explanations for this [feeling].***

- - - -

It is interesting that by this theory ghosts behave exactly like living people: among whom, the selfish ones generally do not notice change unless it affects themselves (and one must assume ghosts to be materially unaffected by change on Earth), whereas the unselfish are interested in the well-being of others and in changes affecting those others.

*{Traditionally for 3 days, I believe}

**[See [Redbook4:105][19871005:2320f]{[The Mind [continued (3)]] – The Three Deaths}[5th October 1987]; & eg:

[Redbook4:110][19871006:1020f]{Death on the Line}[6th October 1987];

[Redbook4:116-117][19871006:1020m]{Hell, Purgatory and Paradise – [1] Hell}[6th October 1987]ff;

& [2]]

***[As indeed for all reported experiences by Humans of ghosts. As indeed for almost everything experienced by Humans and not otherwise explicable. <20190920>]

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{Ghosts}[2nd March 1989]

[Redbook6:107-109)][19890302:2317]{Ghosts}[2nd March 1989]

19890302.2317

I have discussed* a possible explanation of ghosts in terms of those souls whose ‘rejected’ aspects – the selfish, evil, or even tragic – which do not fuse to the Spirit, are so dominant that they represent a recognisable persona, and remain to haunt what they remember – their localities during life – in the way they remember. Such persona cannot change or comprehend change: however much you might attempt to explain to one that the World had moved on, he would never understand. He might, however, notice you; he might not remember you. Such a ghost would be earthbound forever, or at least until destroyed or in some way cast out.

Throughout the history of recorded ghost-experiences, however, we come across another kind: the ghost who stays around remembered locations, remembering the way things were, and tries to contact living people in order to make some arrangement. When this has been done, the ghost may** not come again; some claim to be aware of such ghosts being received at last

by other, perhaps higher spirits, with joy. Similarly, ghosts not given to revisitation may appear uniquely in relation to a particular event involving the living whom the ghost might remember, or have reason to be aware of. Such a ghost does seem to be aware of change, at least in those she communicates with, and one can speculate that this is a Soul which is, or is being, fused with its Spirit to an extent which remains recognisably the person who once lived on Earth, and who either for some reason retains an unselfish attraction to Earth (eg to help another) which prevents her from leaving until the task is accomplished; or who has even been unselfishly attracted back to Earth for a similar purpose, from Timelessness back into Time, for a time, by the only attraction which could bring a spirit out of Unity into Diversity again: that is, Love.

*(In an earlier Vol.) {[(]III. [] 114} [sic; this must be incorrect for

[Redbook4:111-113][19871006:1020h]{Ghosts}[6th October 1987]ff (& ant)]

**[might?]

***{I am not sure which kind of ghost reappears to arrange its own proper re-burial….}

[continues]

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{Outward Uncertainty and Inner Sense [continued]}[25th February 1989]

[Redbook6:107)][19890225:0100]{Outward Uncertainty and Inner Sense [continued]}[25th February 1989]

4

25.0100

But this uncertainty* is not doubt: it is rock-solid.

*[See last previous entry]

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{Outward Uncertainty and Inner Sense}[24th February 1989]

[Redbook6:106-107)][19890224:2034]{Outward Uncertainty and Inner Sense}[24th February 1989]

198902224.2034

But* I believe I have arrived truly at that state of mind which has always been incipient in me: that terrifying condition of having no beliefs exclusively about anything. This does not mean (despite what it says; at least, it is not meant to mean) that I do not believe in anything: far from it. I neither believe nor disbelieve anything, and by the same token I believe and disbelieve everything, or at least everything which I disbelieve and/or believe.**

For instance, I simply cannot say (despite everything I have already said) whether I believe xS’s description of the nature and purpose of Creation*** to be an accurate description or not. The question is impossible for me to answer, as any answer quickly becomes meaningless. (It is, however, and not only for literary purposes, of urgent importance for me to discover whether such a construct could be true, particularly in the light of other people’s models). My own apparent stance generally reflects the position from which I write (or speak) at the time of writing (or speaking); by analysing this in Circle terms, some sense may be made of these viewpoints.

What keeps me together, I think, in the face of this divine uncertainty, is the growing sense of integrity at the centre – the centre of me, and part of my experience: an integrity to which I attach the meaning of the Spirit of God, since it is beyond naming. I suspect that this awareness is an attribute of my circle location; but then, to adapt yet again the immortal words of**** Miss Mandy Rice-Davies, ‘I would,# wouldn’t I?’

*[See, presumably, recent previous journal entries, particularly on religious matters]

**[This does actually make sense, and is not merely a tautology]

***[In [2]]

****[“While giving evidence at [Stephen] Ward's trial [in the aftermath of the Profumo affair in 1963], [Mandy] Rice-Davies made a famous riposte. When [...] the defence counsel pointed out that Lord Astor denied an affair or having even met her, she dismissed the denial by stating, "Well (giggle) he would, wouldn’t he?" (often misquoted "Well he would say that, wouldn't he?"). By 1979, this phrase had entered the third edition of the Oxford Dictionary of Quotations, and is occasionally referred to with the abbreviation MRDA ("Mandy Rice-Davies applies").” (Wikipedia)]

#{(ie suspect that)}

[continues]

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{The Littlecote Orpheus Mosaic}[22nd February 1989]

[Redbook6:104-105A)][19890222:1537c]{The Littlecote Orpheus Mosaic}[22nd February 1989]

19890222.1537

The notes opposite* were taken from yesterday’s [BBC2 TV series] ‘Chronicle’. Very little of the programme was actually about the details of the Mosaic, and I missed most of that while I was hunting for pen and paper; the notes are mostly from memory, and are probably inaccurate and certainly incomplete. But I was particularly interested in the dog which seemed to be on its hind legs beside Orpheus, and reminded me strongly of Tarot 0, The Fool. Littlecote is of particular interest in [1], for its location on the rectangular circuit and for its curious ghost story, linking it with Hans Casthorp’s dream in [Thomas] Mann’s ‘[The] Magic Mountain’** involving the destruction of a female child.

*[See below]

**[[Redbook2:249-251][19821009:2330e]{A Dream of Mann}[9^th October 1982]ff; & esp

[Redbook2:252-256][19821010:1330]{The Magic Mountain}[10^th October 1982]ff]

[Text extracted from ms inserted rough diagram which is reproduced below:]

19890221.

(+19890222)

Littlecote Orpheus Mosaic

‘Chronicle’ BBC2 3pm				33 villa sites round Marlborough (not unusual compared to other centres)
(“1st Quadrant”)	Goat		Bull
	Aphrodite goddess of rebirth		Persephone (Cloak)
		Orpheus	?
		Dog
	Deer		Panther
	Leda (Swan)		Demeter
Elaborate entrance facade via courtyard → Entry via Baths
Mid 4th C[entury]
		(Border motif)

Temple built on site of original Roman London – Bath road

[Some of the images may be misplaced. See photos (not from the ms) reproduced below:]

[

]

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