{A trip to Oxford [continued(7)]}[19th November 1969]

[Redbook1:100-102][19691119:1630a]{A trip to Oxford [continued(7)]}[19th November 1969]

4.30pm Wednesday 19th November 1969 [continued]

            BR I cannot fully fathom yet.  He does not seem to have a real character of his own at the moment; like many children who seem nice at least from above, he appears to draw for his personality on those he meets, accommodating himself to the mood of the moment.  No doubt that will change.  What he lacks in emotional maturity -- a little -- he makes up in intelligence.  It is interesting to speculate on the origins of, and the motives for, his affected accent and slight impediment of speech.  The former may be the result of some long childhood experience (or just imitation?); but the latter is most noticeable when he is speaking in a large company in a society meeting, with all eyes on him.  I should judge that he is more sensitive and less self-reliant than one might imagine at a distance.  This would also explain his need to be charming to his elders -- which is not to suggest that it is necessarily put on for their benefit.  It is probably so deep that he believes it, in which case it can in no sense be called false.  Can a conscious mask or affectation be called false, then?  Draw me the border -- clear and defined -- between a conscious and a subconscious attitude, and I will consider labelling them in a moral sense.

             
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