Sunday, 23 December 2018

{Sexual Intercourse (& Dream Nakedness)}[14th August 1988]


[Redbook5:279-282][19880814:1540b]{Sexual Intercourse (& Dream Nakedness)}[14th August 1988]

.1540
[continued]

Having made* the point that sexuality is placed on one side for the moment, I want to explore the ambiguity of nakedness. On the one hand, innocence and intimacy; on the other hand, intimacy and sexual intercourse. Sexual intercourse is (or should be) only one part of a wide spectrum** of expressions of Love; and they tend to merge into each other in the way that real life matters tend to, disconcertingly for our compartmentalised moral sense. Verbal expressions of Love, for example, merge into symbols, symbols merge into physical [sic], and physical merges into sexual intercourse. It does not follow that one thing leads to another.


*[[Redbook5:277-278][19880814:1130e]{Dream Nakedness}[14th August 1988]]

**It may be a Circle, of course; I don’t know.


[continues]

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Saturday, 22 December 2018

{Fiction and Reality [continued]}[14th August 1988]


[Redbook5:279][19880814:1540]{Fiction and Reality [continued]}[14th August 1988]

.1540


Sense of smell seems to be sharper.



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Thursday, 20 December 2018

{Fiction and Reality}[14th August 1988]


[Redbook5:278-279][19880814:1130f]{Fiction and Reality}[14th August 1988]

19880814.1130
[continued]

I have tried over a long-ish period – about 18 months, I think, with relapses – to change my whole orientation and outlook, at this Crisis point; and I have been particularly aware of this during the last four months.

With this booklet something of tremendous importance is happening to me: having some years go moved the Circles patterns out of the restricted area of short notes for fiction into the ‘permanent’ real but private world of these notebooks; I am now beginning to be able to present the patterns in the public world not just within the framework of fiction, but as a form of Reality in their own right. Unlike the fictions, which I should prefer to publish through publishers, I have always felt that this sort of booklet could and probably should be published directly by us.


[continues]

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{Dream Nakedness}[14th August 1988]


[Redbook5:277-278][19880814:1130e]{Dream Nakedness}[14th August 1988]

19880814.1130
[continued]

The ‘fins’* are interesting, as they seem to be an attempt to de-sexualise (although not de-gender) these* girls during the dream. I have never had the impression that these# dream girls disapprove of sex, or are ignorant of it: it is just that, during the dreams[,] they seem to have other things on their (and my) mind.** Their nakedness is, I think, the nakedness of innocence and intimacy, rather than of sexual intercourse.

I suspect that the repeated recent theme of my own clothes has to do with this, and with the casting off of outer (circle) layers, rather than the classic interpretation (ie, that I am in a situation where I feel I do not belong). What is interesting is that I am now in there with them, naked with them, although obviously still needing reassurance that my old ‘outer’ ways are still there!

My adventures with these Undines go back a very long way:# – [sic] nearly two decades, at the very least.#* Of all the inhabitants of this strange world whom I have so far encountered, it is they whom I love most – not surprisingly, if Love is their inner Quality.#**

I do not think that I am trying to repress sexual feelings of any sort: there is not the slightest trace of guilt in me that I am aware of, now. I see this as a perfectly understandable attempt to place sexuality slightly to one side for the moment, at a point when it seems prima facie indicated but is inappropriate because it gets in the way of the real business (I relate this to the Inner Life, not the outer). #*** There are plenty of everyday circumstances in which the same is true, eg when you have to strip in front of a lady Doctor or Nurse for medical examination.#****


*[See last previous entry but 2, [Redbook5:275-276][19880814:1130b]{Two Dreams: Of swimming with fair-haired girls [continued]}[14th August 1988]]

**cp [2:] xP: ‘I’ve a purpose here, and it isn’t sex.’

***(Can you imagine anything more disconcerting, while writing this,**** than being crawled over by 3-year old daughter, shining a torch in my ears and eyes; and who has now gone, leaving beside me a huge torch, a toy tank, and a pair of used socks?)

****[An arrow inserted later points this marginal note towards the last entry but one; everything since [Redbook5:275-276][19880814:1130]{Two Dreams: Of swimming with fair-haired girls}[14th August 1988] would have been written at one sitting.]

#ref I. [ref not found] 135Aff;
& II. [[Redbook2:39A][19740528]{Dream of a Community of Girls}[28th May 1974][Aged 23]] 39A,
[[Redbook2:82B][19760221:0000]{A Dream? – of Water and Death}[21st February 1976]] 82B,
[[Redbook2:96F][19770129:0000]{A Dream: Of Four River-Nymphs}[29th January 1977]] 96F.
[& see eg [Redbook4:219-224][19871213:2005]{Walking with the Fair-haired Girl}[13th December 1987]; & esp
[Redbook4:219-220][19871213:2005c]{Walking with the Fair-haired Girl [continued (3)]}[13th December 1987]]

#*(But somewhere at the back of my mind is a hint of memory of childhood dreams of this kind.)

#**&cp [2], +C to xS on ‘The Simplicity of Nakedness’
[(– presumably a reference here to Simplification as their outer Principle.)
For you above all of us,
the simplicity of nakedness
is the only dress you need;
for what else could do justice to Love?
But the full glory of immortal Love
is too bright for most Men:
it must be covered,
or it will burn them....’
(– +C to xS, near the end of [2] as originally drafted)
]

#***I suppose the reason I bang on [sic] about sex so much is because I am aware of the likely conventional interpretations of such dreams, in Freudian and other terms.
{cf [[Redbook5:303-305][19880817:1703]{Sexual Love}[17th August 1988],] 303}
[& [Redbook5:279-282][19880814:1540b]{Sexual Intercourse (& Dream Nakedness)}[14th August 1988]]

#****or, of course, go swimming naked in a mixed group.
[as the writer did frequently from childhood through the teenage years, in mixed groups of all ages;
eg [Redbook1:26][19680416:2250]{The Lake}[16th April 1968][Age 16]]


[It seems obvious reading this now that not just the fins, but (given the evident fluidity of these forms over time) the physical immaturity apparent, were all part of the same message, that sexuality was not appropriate – a message that, whoever or whatever it came from, seems to have been clearly understood at the time. This understanding is perhaps particularly relevant, and also possibly pre-conditional, to what manifested later that day: [Redbook5:285-287][19880815:0040]{Undine (1)}[15th August 1988]. <20181220>
& cf [Redbook4:221-222][19871213:2005e]{Walking with the Fair-haired Girl [continued (5)]}[13th December 1987], para 2 (&3) <20190102>]


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Wednesday, 19 December 2018

{An Experience: of the Contra-Rotating [O]}[14th August 1988]


[Redbook5:276-277][19880814:1130d]{An Experience: of the Contra-Rotating [O]}[14th August 1988]

19880814.1130
[continued]

In between these dreams,* on another night, while going to sleep I was pre-occupied with the accelerating revolutions of the [O] overhead, as in [2], with great red spokes humming across the darkness but introducing, in this case, the contrary motion of contra-rotation, red spokes revolving simultaneously the other way, as I realised for the first time that the [O] in [2] represented only one rotation of the Circles. Which one?

What I think is happening is that I am writing the booklet on a balanced contra-rotation, unlike in earlier attempts: although the journey is, at this stage, Outer Circle, the motivation is Inner Circle; starting through Love, of the Archetypes (Archangels) in particular. This does seem to be working quite well, although** it produces a less rigorous and more rambling progress.


*[See last 3 previous entries]

**(perhaps because?)




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Tuesday, 18 December 2018

{Two Dreams: Of swimming with fair-haired girls [continued (3)]}[14th August 1988]


[Redbook5:276][19880814:1130c]{Two Dreams: Of swimming with fair-haired girls [continued (3)]}[14th August 1988]

19880814.1130
[continued]

Both dreams* were relatively unsexual, at the time. In both dreams I was a bit of a bumbler, a clown – or a Fool; but was treated with genuinely affectionate good nature; loving, I should say. Both these characteristics were more pronounced in the second dream than the first.


*[See 2 last previous entries]




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Monday, 17 December 2018

{Two Dreams: Of swimming with fair-haired girls [continued]}[14th August 1988]


[Redbook5:275-276][19880814:1130b]{Two Dreams: Of swimming with fair-haired girls [continued]}[14th August 1988]

19880814.1130
[continued]

This morning a dream of myself involved with a party of young girls* and an older woman in a swimming party from a beach, in a wide but otherwise deserted bay.** In this case the woman and the girls seemed to have, as if for swimsuits, curious flesh-coloured, regular skirt-like fins, garments or appendages (– a little like those in the illustrations to my addition of [Charles] Kingsley’s [book] ‘The Water Babies’, which I have in the past felt rather unnecessary, even irritating). The older woman (and possibly some of the girls?) also had another of these sets of ‘fins’ round the chest, in place of a bikini top; the younger girls had them only round the hips, as they were flat-chested. But that they were all girls I was in no doubt at all – one in particular leaping among the waves now rolling towards the shore (at an overcast moment) having a distinctly xS-ish look, although not perhaps identical. Later in this dream, on the shore, I had a problem finding my clothes among theirs – only to find that I had already (put?)# on the shirt I was looking for.


*(all fair-haired, I think)

**cf [1]: The Bay of Love? [– a feature of the [...]land in an episode which was removed from [1] during revision; the Bay is likely to be used in a later fiction – possibly [L]]

***[Charles Kingsley (12 June 1819 – 23 January 1875) was a broad church priest of the Church of England, a university professor, social reformer, historian and novelist. He is particularly associated with Christian socialism, the working men's college, and forming labour cooperatives that failed but led to the working reforms of the progressive era. He was a friend and correspondent with Charles Darwin. He was also the uncle of traveller and scientist Mary Kingsley. (– Wikipedia)]

****[The Water-Babies, A Fairy Tale for a Land Baby is a children's novel by Charles Kingsley. Written in 1862–63 as a serial for Macmillan's Magazine, it was first published in its entirety in 1863. It was written as part satire in support of Charles Darwin's The Origin of Species. The book was extremely popular in England, and was a mainstay of British children's literature for many decades, but eventually fell out of favour in part due to its prejudices (common at the time) against Irish, Jews, Catholics, Americans, and the poor. (– Wikipedia)]

#[word in brackets inserted in ms]


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{Two Dreams: Of swimming with fair-haired girls}[14th August 1988]


[Redbook5:275-276][19880814:1130]{Two Dreams: Of swimming with fair-haired girls}[14th August 1988]

19880814.1130

Early this week – before starting the booklet?* – a dream of a girl with glowing fair hair, swimming naked with me in a river; I think also a dark-haired man related to her, and also [W], on our sidelines. The water rose and began to wet my clothes, but only slightly: I swam across to rescue them.


*[See last previous entry]

**cf [[Redbook5:266][19880808:2229]{The Beat of Angelic Wings}[8th August 1988],] 266
{ref [[Redbook5:149][19880613:0930]{A Dream: The Illustrated Girl}[13th June 1988],] 149}
{I must also relate that she (and he) could also be partly inspired by new-found friends of ours….}


[continues]

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Saturday, 15 December 2018

{Booklet Outer M~ continued}[13th August 1988]


[Redbook5:275][19880813:2002]{Booklet Outer M~ continued}[13th August 1988]

19880813.2002

The Booklet seems to have taken off, but I am feeling slightly unwell: sore-ish throat, faintness in the legs, etc..*

One point to emerge out of the list on the left** is that after the Point of Accumulation, the Powers, Virtues, Vices etc. are only selections out of a plurality of such qualities.



*Also a kind of sensual warmth… even though I may be cold at times. <880814>

**ref [last previous entry, [Redbook5:274][19880812:0025b]{Angelic Degrees}[12th August 1988],] 274



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Thursday, 13 December 2018

{Angelic Degrees}[12th August 1988]


[Redbook5:274][19880812:0025b]{Angelic Degrees}[12th August 1988]

.0025
[continued]

This is a revised* attempt to pin down the nature of Angelic hierarchies from our point of view:


[Text extracted from ms table shown above:]



The Ophanim

Wheel (collective)



**
***





c
0
1
Seraphim
└→
Serpent

s~
1
2
Cherubim****
└→
Chariots
Vertical Polarity
|
m~
2
4
Thrones
└→
Cardinal Qualities
Vertical + Horizontal
+
u~
3
8
Dominions
└→
Cardinal Qualities
+ Principles
#
a~
4
16
Principalities
└→
Qualities & Principles
Cardinal & Diagonal
#*
#**
----
----
----------------
----
----------------------------
---[Point of Accumulation]#**

j~
5

Powers
└→
+ Gift of the Spirit &c


g~
6

Virtues
└→
+ Virtues, Cardinal,
Spiritual &c

r~
7

Archangels
└→
+ Special Messengers

\

/ #***
c
8

Angels
└→
+ Ordinary Messengers
/
\ #***

In this instance, each level includes the level above, but in diffused form.#****

Numbers:
The first column [of numbers, headed ‘Powers/Dimensions’]** is the power[,] or number of dimensions (Time = 0,; 1,2,3 = spatial; 4 = ?solidity/spin; 5-8 = chaotic, ‘reducing’ or balancing 1-4.)
The second column [of numbers, headed ‘No. of Types’, ie 2 to the power of the number in the first column]*** is the number of basic differentiations possible in each dimension.## This might not necessarily [mean] that there can be only one Seraphim; merely that if there are more than one, they will all be the same fundamental type; but that there can be 2 types of Cherubim. But Ezekiel##* has 4 – so unless they were Thrones (they carried the Throne), you would have to start one level up (or down) on Pascal’s Triangle##** – which would put the Point of Accumulation##*** at just before or after Distraction, which [then] has No. 32 [in the 2nd column of numbers] instead of 16. All sorts of other changes may follow!

But would the Spirit → God(0) → Son(1)(2) progression be clearer than
Spirit(0) → God(1) → Son[sic] ?


*(cf IV.[[Redbook4:142-143][19871020:2058]{Angelic Hierarchies [continued (19)]}[20th October 1987],]143

**[ms column heading:] Powers/Dimensions

***[ms column heading:] No. of types [ie the 2 to the power of the number in the previous column]

****(There should be 4 per Ezekiel [Chapter 1]? [See fn##*, &fn ult ##****, below])

#[Tiny alternative diagrams in ms here: (1) A square cross concentric with 2 concentric circles, of the outer of which circles it is diametric; or (2) concentric square and diagonal crosses with no circles.]

#*[Tiny ms diagram here of concentric square and diagonal crosses concentric with 2 concentric circles, of the outer of which they are diametric.]
Names <880818>

#**[ms row description:] Point of Accumulation

#***re Vices & general living <880813>

#****[cf [Redbook5:223][19880724:1443h]{The Sphere [continued (8)]}[24th July 1988]]

##eg Thrones:
G~
A~
M~
+CI~


##*Ezekiel [Chapter 1] has 4 – they must have been Thrones
[See fn ult##**** below, which doesn’t appear actually to mention Cherubim in either translation.]
[Perhaps they were the front and rear axle.... :)]

##**[[Redbook5:222-223][19880724:1443g]{The Sphere [continued (7)]}[24th July 1988],] p223
[& see [Redbook5:218-239][19880722:2307]{The Sphere}[22nd July 1988]ff]

##***[[Redbook5:248-262][19880803:1017b]{Chaotic Determinism (+ Extracts)}[3rd August 1988];
[Redbook5:253-254][19880804:1354b]{Chaotic Determinism (+ Extracts) [continued (12)]}[4th August 1988]]

##****
[
Ezekiel, Chapter 1: (Authorised/King James version – for modern translation, see below)

1 Now it came to pass in the thirtieth year, in the fourth month, in the fifth day of the month, as I was among the captives by the river of Chebar, that the heavens were opened, and I saw visions of God. 2 In the fifth day of the month, which was the fifth year of king Jehoiachin’s captivity, 3 the word of the Lord came expressly unto Ezekiel the priest, the son of Buzi, in the land of the Chaldeans by the river Chebar; and the hand of the Lord was there upon him.

4 And I looked, and, behold, a whirlwind came out of the north, a great cloud, and a fire infolding itself, and a brightness was about it, and out of the midst thereof as the colour of amber, out of the midst of the fire. 5 Also out of the midst thereof came the likeness of four living creatures. And this was their appearance; they had the likeness of a man. 6 And every one had four faces, and every one had four wings. 7 And their feet were straight feet; and the sole of their feet was like the sole of a calf’s foot: and they sparkled like the colour of burnished brass. 8 And they had the hands of a man under their wings on their four sides; and they four had their faces and their wings. 9 Their wings were joined one to another; they turned not when they went; they went every one straight forward. 10 As for the likeness of their faces, they four had the face of a man, and the face of a lion, on the right side: and they four had the face of an ox on the left side; they four also had the face of an eagle. 11 Thus were their faces: and their wings were stretched upward; two wings of every one were joined one to another, and two covered their bodies. 12 And they went every one straight forward: whither the spirit was to go, they went; and they turned not when they went. 13 As for the likeness of the living creatures, their appearance was like burning coals of fire, and like the appearance of lamps: it went up and down among the living creatures; and the fire was bright, and out of the fire went forth lightning. 14 And the living creatures ran and returned as the appearance of a flash of lightning.

15 Now as I beheld the living creatures, behold one wheel upon the earth by the living creatures, with his four faces. 16 The appearance of the wheels and their work was like unto the colour of a beryl: and they four had one likeness: and their appearance and their work was as it were a wheel in the middle of a wheel. 17 When they went, they went upon their four sides: and they turned not when they went. 18 As for their rings, they were so high that they were dreadful; and their rings were full of eyes round about them four. 19 And when the living creatures went, the wheels went by them: and when the living creatures were lifted up from the earth, the wheels were lifted up. 20 Whithersoever the spirit was to go, they went, thither was their spirit to go; and the wheels were lifted up over against them: for the spirit of the living creature was in the wheels. 21 When those went, these went; and when those stood, these stood; and when those were lifted up from the earth, the wheels were lifted up over against them: for the spirit of the living creature was in the wheels.

22 And the likeness of the firmament upon the heads of the living creature was as the colour of the terrible crystal, stretched forth over their heads above. 23 And under the firmament were their wings straight, the one toward the other: every one had two, which covered on this side, and every one had two, which covered on that side, their bodies. 24 And when they went, I heard the noise of their wings, like the noise of great waters, as the voice of the Almighty, the voice of speech, as the noise of an host: when they stood, they let down their wings. 25 And there was a voice from the firmament that was over their heads, when they stood, and had let down their wings.

26 And above the firmament that was over their heads was the likeness of a throne, as the appearance of a sapphire stone: and upon the likeness of the throne was the likeness as the appearance of a man above upon it. 27 And I saw as the colour of amber, as the appearance of fire round about within it, from the appearance of his loins even upward, and from the appearance of his loins even downward, I saw as it were the appearance of fire, and it had brightness round about. 28 As the appearance of the bow that is in the cloud in the day of rain, so was the appearance of the brightness round about. This was the appearance of the likeness of the glory of the Lord. And when I saw it, I fell upon my face, and I heard a voice of one that spake.
(Authorised/King James Version of the Bible)


(B) Modern translation:

Ezekiel Chapter 1:
The Vision of the Chariot
1 In the thirtieth year, in the fourth month, on the fifth day of the month, as I was among the exiles by the river Chebar, the heavens were opened, and I saw visions of God. 2 On the fifth day of the month (it was the fifth year of the exile of King Jehoi′achin), 3 the word of the Lord came to Ezekiel the priest, the son of Buzi, in the land of the Chalde′ans by the river Chebar; and the hand of the Lord was upon him there.

4 As I looked, behold, a stormy wind came out of the north, and a great cloud, with brightness round about it, and fire flashing forth continually, and in the midst of the fire, as it were gleaming bronze. 5 And from the midst of it came the likeness of four living creatures. And this was their appearance: they had the form of men, 6 but each had four faces, and each of them had four wings. 7 Their legs were straight, and the soles of their feet were like the sole of a calf’s foot; and they sparkled like burnished bronze. 8 Under their wings on their four sides they had human hands. And the four had their faces and their wings thus: 9 their wings touched one another; they went every one straight forward, without turning as they went. 10 As for the likeness of their faces, each had the face of a man in front;[a] the four had the face of a lion on the right side, the four had the face of an ox on the left side, and the four had the face of an eagle at the back.[b] 11 Such were their faces. And their wings were spread out above; each creature had two wings, each of which touched the wing of another, while two covered their bodies. 12 And each went straight forward; wherever the spirit would go, they went, without turning as they went. 13 In the midst of[c] the living creatures there was something that looked like burning coals of fire, like torches moving to and fro among the living creatures; and the fire was bright, and out of the fire went forth lightning. 14 And the living creatures darted to and fro, like a flash of lightning.

15 Now as I looked at the living creatures, I saw a wheel upon the earth beside the living creatures, one for each of the four of them.[d] 16 As for the appearance of the wheels and their construction: their appearance was like the gleaming of a chrysolite; and the four had the same likeness, their construction being as it were a wheel within a wheel. 17 When they went, they went in any of their four directions[e] without turning as they went. 18 The four wheels had rims and they had spokes;[f] and their rims were full of eyes round about. 19 And when the living creatures went, the wheels went beside them; and when the living creatures rose from the earth, the wheels rose. 20 Wherever the spirit would go, they went, and the wheels rose along with them; for the spirit of the living creatures was in the wheels. 21 When those went, these went; and when those stood, these stood; and when those rose from the earth, the wheels rose along with them; for the spirit of the living creatures was in the wheels.

22 Over the heads of the living creatures there was the likeness of a firmament, shining like crystal,[g] spread out above their heads. 23 And under the firmament their wings were stretched out straight, one toward another; and each creature had two wings covering its body. 24 And when they went, I heard the sound of their wings like the sound of many waters, like the thunder of the Almighty, a sound of tumult like the sound of a host; when they stood still, they let down their wings. 25 And there came a voice from above the firmament over their heads; when they stood still, they let down their wings.

26 And above the firmament over their heads there was the likeness of a throne, in appearance like sapphire;[h] and seated above the likeness of a throne was a likeness as it were of a human form. 27 And upward from what had the appearance of his loins I saw as it were gleaming bronze, like the appearance of fire enclosed round about; and downward from what had the appearance of his loins I saw as it were the appearance of fire, and there was brightness round about him.[i] 28 Like the appearance of the bow that is in the cloud on the day of rain, so was the appearance of the brightness round about.

Such was the appearance of the likeness of the glory of the Lord. And when I saw it, I fell upon my face, and I heard the voice of one speaking.

Footnotes:
Ezekiel 1:10 Cn: Heb lacks in front
Ezekiel 1:10 Cn: Heb lacks at the back
Ezekiel 1:13 Gk Old Latin: Heb And the likeness of
Ezekiel 1:15 Heb of their faces
Ezekiel 1:17 Heb on their four sides
Ezekiel 1:18 Cn: Heb uncertain
Ezekiel 1:22 Gk: Heb awesome crystal
Ezekiel 1:26 Heb lapis lazuli
Ezekiel 1:27 Or it
(Revised Standard Version of the Bible)
]


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